Living in the present can be very difficult to do if you struggle to let go of the past, yet it is often the only way to enjoy a fulfilled life and plan for the future. Those who find themselves struggling to come to terms and move past emotional and physical problems of their past will often find themselves unable to plan for the future and enjoy their day to day life, regardless of how much they want to remove their emotional restraints. Changing thought patterns and leaving the past behind is not necessarily an easy journey, and often involves a lot of hard work and dedication, but can be achieved in a number of ways.
Get Rid of the Rose-Tinted Glasses
Not all past experiences are negative, and you may find yourself unable to move on because you feel your life has got considerably worse since the end of particular period of your life. With past experiences, we often look back to them either in a positive light, or a negative one, rather than pragmatically which is why many of us find it difficult to let go of the past. With past relationships, or experiences, we can easily view them with rose-tinted glasses and therefore find it difficult to move on, leaving us feeling sad in the present. When trying to let go of the past, it is important to try and view situations pragmatically and realistically and to understand the reasons why their life has changed.
Focus on the Future
Those who are living in the past, need to try to change their thinking habits and begin to focus on the future. Spending time thinking of past issues can often leave a person feel down and inactive in regards to planning their future. Rather than obsess over what could have been, instead begin to make plans for the future. Signing up for courses, learning new skill, booking holidays, and even starting savings accounts are all great ways to begin living in the present and planning for the future.
Those trying to move on should remember that it will be twice as difficult if they don’t have anything to occupy themselves in the present, so should try not to consume their time reminiscing but instead partaking in daily tasks that they enjoy and making changes that will aid development and allow for emotional issues that keep you attached to your past to be mended.
Cope with Emotions
The only real way to move past events and issues from your personal history is to learn to cope with or overcome the emotions that surround them. Although it can be a lengthy process to dissect the emotions you feel and that surround past issues, there are ways that an individual can learn to understand them and control them better so that they can begin to fully enjoy their day-to-day lives.
Investing in emotional understanding will be a continual benefit to anyone, especially if struggling to leave the past in the past. If you are finding it difficult to understand the emotional connections you continue to have with past experiences despite no longer wanting to have a connection, taking a short course in NLP training may help you learn to overcome your past, understand the emotions surrounding it, and become a stronger, better, version of yourself that will make the most of your present and future.
Regardless of why you are unable to move beyond the past and start living in the present, trying to overcome the emotional restraints that keep you from moving on will help you begin to enjoy the present day and plan for a positive future.
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Beth Stubbings thinks that it is important for all individuals to come to terms with any emotional issues from their past that they have left unresolved so that they can live a full and happy life, but understands that it can be a difficult process. For anyone considering using NLP as a way to move past emotional issues, she would recommend The Performance Partnership.
- 30 Vital Things Your Future Self Will Thank You For (lifehack.org)